When Sober Curious Strikes Past Dry January

At the start of 2025, the previous US Surgeon Basic issued an advisory on the hyperlink between alcohol consumption and cancer risk. Whereas it is a sobering name to motion, there isn’t any denying that sober curiosity has elevated lately. From Dry January to extra manufacturers creating alcohol-free drinks to the rise of mainstream mocktails, now greater than ever even informal drinkers have gotten sober curious and analyzing their relationship with alcohol.

Final 12 months in Episode 146 of the FBG Podcast, Sobriety Coach, and Founding father of Sober Wild, Krysty Krywko, Ed.D, joined our EIC Alison for an interview on sobriety. At this time we’re persevering with this dialog with Krysty. Dry January has handed however definitely not the questions on what we will do if we’re fascinated by a sober (utterly alcohol free), or damp (a discount in alcohol consumption), life. 

Tam: Ought to we strategy consuming as all or nothing, particularly if we’re sober curious?

Krysty: I feel it’s a really private determination, however when you’re any type of an everyday drinker (that means three or 4 nights per week “simply to unwind”) then alcohol is impacting the best way you are feeling – mentally, emotionally, and bodily – your physique simply doesn’t know there’s one other means. For those who’re not consuming in the course of the week, however then consuming a few bottles of wine over the weekend, you by no means actually get the possibility to see how your physique and thoughts reacts to no alcohol. Anna Lembke, in her ebook, Dopamine Nation: Finding Balance in the Age of Indulgence, talks about how “abstaining from our drug of selection for a minimum of 4 weeks provides clarifying behaviors. Perception that merely just isn’t attainable whereas we proceed to make use of.” In different phrases, you don’t have any thought how shitty you actually really feel once you’re utilizing a substance that’s making you are feeling shitty. It normally takes a couple of weeks in your physique to regulate to the truth that you’re not consuming a poisonous substance.

Tam: Are there issues/finest practices to go from Dry January to extra of a Damp February and past? 

Krysty: So, I don’t actually know the reply to that query, it actually is dependent upon what your motivation was for Dry January. Was the plan to simply see when you may make it with out consuming for 30 days? Or had been you on the lookout for actual well being advantages? Or did you notice that your consuming has elevated over the previous few years and you recognize you wanted to take a break?

Moderation, which is admittedly what Damp February is all about, doesn’t work for lots of people. For those who spend loads of time bargaining with your self at any time when alcohol is concerned, which results in loads of “guidelines” round your consuming, you would possibly wish to take a step again.

You won’t even pay attention to these guidelines. They’ve simply turn out to be a part of your interior chatter. That chatter would possibly sound like this:
I’m not going to drink on my own.
No consuming earlier than 5:00 p.m.
No exhausting alcohol in the course of the week
I’m solely going to drink white wine (or beer, or vodka, and so forth.)
I can’t have greater than two drinks on per week night time.
I can’t drink greater than two nights in a row. 

The tip days of my consuming had been full of elaborate and arcane guidelines that had been consistently shifting as I broke one after one other. I used to be letting myself down every day, and that type of self-disappointment was like a continuing stream of micro-cuts to my soul.

Take a second and take into consideration why you’re placing so many guidelines round your consuming. You would possibly simply determine that it’s not price it.

Tam: If somebody is studying this pondering “I don’t have an issue with my alcohol consumption however wish to take a extra conscious strategy to what I eat/drink,” what questions needs to be explored when fascinated by alcohol consumption? 

Krysty: One of many first issues we have to do is transfer away from the language round consuming and the assumption that there are “drawback drinkers” after which everybody else. This results in disgrace, stigma, and judgement.

A way more helpful, and lifelike, mannequin to make use of with regards to speaking about alcohol is the concept of consuming occurring on a spectrum. That’s the place the concept of “grey space drinker” emerged from, which encompasses everybody from the every-now-and-then drinker to those that are bodily hooked on alcohol. The fantastic thing about this mannequin is that you simply don’t have to hit any form of a all-time low earlier than you’ll be able to discover your relationship with alcohol, you get to determine at any level on the spectrum what’s best for you.

For those who’re able to get trustworthy with the position alcohol performs in your life, I might counsel sitting down with a pen and paper and answering the next questions. Get interested by your self, and take the time to reply truthfully. Don’t cloud your responses with disgrace, or judgement, or what your bestie goes to suppose. That is about you and the one life that you’ve got, and whether or not or not you need a poisonous substance to play a job within the creation of that life. 

Is alcohol nonetheless working for me?
How is alcohol making me really feel?
What areas of my life has alcohol taken over?
Does consuming align with the particular person I’m now?
What would “future you” inform “current you” on this scenario?

Tam: What if our mates have gone again to consuming after Dry January, however we are attempting to proceed. Do you may have strategies/suggestions for learn how to make this a part of my way of life with my consuming mates? 

Krysty: You would possibly want to seek out new mates – haha. However, critically, if your mates really respect and assist you within the selections you make in your life, then it shouldn’t be an issue. However, in the event that they’re regularly attempting to push you to start out consuming once more, whining that you simply’re not enjoyable anymore, or that one shot of tequila gained’t do any hurt, then you definately would possibly have to rethink who you’re spending time with. You could work out for your self what you wish to do with the time that you’ve got, and the individuals you spend it with. 

Moreover, in case your pal group is closely immersed in consuming tradition – that means most social actions revolve round alcohol – then you definately would possibly want to seek out some new peeps that love to do various things.

Tam: Any favourite “drink” hacks to exchange that Friday night time cocktail? 

Krysty: I’m probably the most primary sober particular person round – and I’m pleased with consuming a seltzer on my sofa to unwind after a busy week. However, I do know that folks have totally different wants, and I get that within the early days of going alcohol-free you may want one thing a bit extra thrilling. Fortunately, the alcohol-free market is on fireplace! There are such a lot of merchandise in the marketplace – suppose flavored seltzers, glowing teas, alcohol-free beers, wines, and spirits, kombuchas – I actually may go on and on. I’m regularly impressed on the locations the place I discover alcohol-free drinks – Goal, Dealer Joe’s, Entire Meals, common grocery shops, and native alcohol-free bottle retailers are beginning to supply such all kinds. My solely warning is be intentional when utilizing alcohol-free merchandise, particularly issues like alcohol-free wine or beer. For those who’re downing a bottle of alcohol-free wine most nights of the week, it’s type of like ripping off one bandage and placing on one other, and also you would possibly wish to discover why you’re caught in the identical behaviors. 

Did you do Dry January this 12 months and keep a dry or damp February? What’s your sober curious hack? ~ Tam